I Hate Fear – But It Works!

I hate fear.

I loathe fear, but …

Fear has given me everything I have achieved. It has also kept me away from many things I wanted.

Confused? I’ll explain …

I believe in Do What You Love, I really do. BUT there’s a dirty little secret that everyone shoves under the carpet. One that I’ll reveal here … there’s another side to the coin! The missing piece! … You must also Do What You Fear! Yes, it’s true.

My Story

I’ve read every self-help book out there (or so it feels), I’ve spent decades chasing the almighty dollar, started several business, had many successes and many failures, some big some small. I’ve had times when everything went well, and I’ve had times when nothing went well.

There was a time when I couldn’t earn a dime for over a year (yes, that’s no income) not because of lack of opportunity or intelligence, but because of fear.

Am I a chicken?

No, I’m just a guy. But fear ruled my life until I decided to master it. Not eliminate it, just master it.

Fear kept me from doing the things I needed to do, things I wanted to do. It kept me not only from becoming wealthy, but from even earning a basic income. It sucked big time.

But the day I decided to conquer fear was the day my life turned around. That day there was a change in the weather and my life started to turn around.

So what changed?

What changed was that I stopped assuming I had to be fearless to proceed. I also stopped avoiding fear. I started dancing with fear, facing my fears, understanding my fears, and conquering my fears.

I got clear on what fears were holding me back the most. There weren’t that many fears in the end, it was just the same ones repeating themselves over and over again.

The amazing thing was that, in the end, it wasn’t that difficult to make the change. What I discovered is that most of the fears that held me back weren’t that major. It’s not like I had to learn how to jump off a cliff without a parachute or something.

A lot of it was something as simple as being able to start a conversation with strangers, ask for someone to buy something, put myself out there, make an opinion or idea public, make a mistake, or be imperfect.

I could go on and on with my list of fears, but once I listed all of my fears that were holding me back, I realized that in that long long list there really were just a handful of the same ones that kept coming up in different situations. There really were just a half dozen that if all I did was conquer or master those, then my life would turn around. So I did, and it did.

“Fear” Itself Is Scary

You see, fears pop up in our lives all the time every day. Everyone experiences them. We just don’t call it “fear” because the word fear is scary in itself. I have a friend who claimed she had no fears, until I told her she had at least a dozen that I could name right off the bat, including the fear of admitting she had fears. She realized I was right when I started listing them.

Fear comes in many different formats. Sometimes it shows up as hesitation. Sometimes as procrastination, indecisiveness, or lack of progress. If you know you should be farther along in your life, or more successful, or wealthier, or healthier, or whatever, then there’s a great chance you’re holding yourself back. If that’s the case, then fears, whether acknowledged or not are impeding your progress.

The Problem With Self-Help

The problem with self-help these days is that a lot of time there’s a huge emphasis on motivation, on building up your dream and going for it.

We can know what we want, have a huge desire for it, know we should do it, get all the knowledge to do it, and still not do it. What’s up with that? !!

Believe me, I’m so guilty of having a ton of potential and not achieving the results I should have. We all suffer that problem.

So why does that happen?

It happens because we forgot to take our foot off the brakes.

It’s like trying to drive a car to somewhere exciting … we know where we want to go, we’re motivated to go there, we know how to get there, we have the vehicle, we point the car in the right direction, step on gas, and … nothing. So we rev up the engine, add more power, and the car moves forward an inch, but still basically … nothing! Maybe we need a more powerful engine, or a different vehicle, or a different destination. You change everything but still … nothing!

What’s happening?!! Why can’t you move? !! There is an answer, a simple answer …

Take your foot off the brakes.

This was the secret I missed most of my years.

It seems so obvious, but most people, if they’re honest with themselves, would know that the biggest reason for their lack of success or anything else they want is that they are holding back … they haven’t taken their foot off the brakes.

It’s not a lack of motivation or wanting. It’s not a lack of opportunity or knowledge. It’s plain and simple, fear is holding them back. Fear is putting on the brakes. Fear is stopping them from having everything they could ever want.

Is this you?

The good news is that there are simple and fast ways to get rid of these fears and blocks, release the brakes, and be propelled forward faster than you ever dreamed of. Once you release the brakes, everything else you’ve ever done will kick in and you’ll achieve more goals and get more out of your life than you ever dreamed possible.

What would life be like if you learned how to master your fears? … If you let go of your blocks and took your foot off the brakes?

You would all of a sudden move forward to achieve all you wanted, live a life of fun and freedom, enjoy people, achieve success, and live life to the fullest.

It’s actually very simple. There are a few simple steps. It’s not all easy, because it will mean facing some of your fears, but it is simple.

How bad could dealing with your fears be compared to a lifetime of freedom, achievement, and fun?

Keep Your Eyes On This Blog

Am I fearless? Hardly. This is a lifelong process. I’ve got much to face in this adventure called life.

I prefer the term “master” over “conquer” because conquer implies that the fear goes away when it never really does. “Master” is better because it implies that you took control of that fear and stopped letting it get in your way by facing it under your terms. Then you gained the benefits of kicking that fear in the butt.

If you’re ready to transform your life … then keep your eyes on this blog! I’ll be writing about this topic a lot!

Mark

© 2009 Mark Lengies